theres some sort of bonfire shit happening tonight by the well sounds like your speed you know i just found the rough draft i had night one to send to this account when i assumed it was your account but didnt know for sure i forget why i didnt send it i guess i found my sense of shame that has only worked intermittently for like sixteen years its since broken again but whatever you know anyway im told there will be food and obviously a huge ass fire which is i suppose every component of a bonfire? ive never actually been to a bonfire i suppose it appeals to the inner pyromaniac in us all which must be a human nature thing and troll nature thing ive never actually tried burning shit either except for food on accident which i guess doesnt count as trying thats more just fate anyway ill talk to you later dude this has been a psa re bonfires remember only you can prevent forest fires do you remember those commercials i miss fucking stupid commercials weirdest thing to miss about earth but i do
[See at first he was just going to show up and not actually say anything because okay, Dave, sure, he's used to the rambling and all of that but then he rereads it and thinks of one important thing.]
Things are all set. Your matches up turned the weirdest, since I’m giving you the same person for a teacher and student. Her name’s Ochako, reach her at #E07CA0. She has a “quirk,” which is what they say where she’s from to indicate a supernatural power of some sort. I want you to try and trump that however you can. By trying your best, you’ll also learn a number of things, so I’ve got a good feeling about this. You’ll both get along, but that means you can’t hold back, no matter what. Rely on each other and try your best and you’ll grow strong together.
On top of that, I've got you with Joshua as your second teacher. #000033. He's a lot more calm and collected than Ochako, and I've got the feeling he'll go at it from a different angle, too. He's got knives, but that doesn't mean he can't teach you and your hammer a thing or two.
Oh, and you’re sparring Shouto, a classmate of hers. Username #57A7C5. He’s got a quirk too, and he’s pretty strong, so don’t take him for granted or hold back.
There are no changes. If you back out of this, you’re letting everyone down, so go tell them yourself and don’t waste my time again. I’m not holding your hand through all of this, but you can let me know if you have questions. That’s all.
Edited (I checked my lists so many times and still forgot them in some directions, sorry!) 2018-03-24 01:12 (UTC)
oh, i know her! that is totally fair. i've heard about her quirk and stuff too so i think that will work. i don't mind being a teacher and student.
haven't met joshua though so i will figure that out. knives are fine. and i'll just have to ask shouto what his quirk is (unless you know. do you know??)
but cool. glad to know there's no pressure here or anything. thanks a lot.
john! did you get guren's message a few days ago? about the training thing? becaaaaaause you're my teacher AND my student! yay! we're going to have a ton of fun! :)
yeah i did! i'm really excited too, it's going to be awesome to train with you! i cannot wait to see how your quirk works in action. i've never had a teacher-student before. when do you want to start?
whats it called when theres a ghost sitting on your chest when you wake up and you cant move thats what they say it is right when theres all the pins and needles and you think about moving and you can even picture your hand reaching out but your fingers dont so much as twitch and youre screaming at them to but the synapses just dont fire or they do but they cant connect with your nerves like your nerves all went out to lunch didnt even bother to leave a sign on the door left your tendons and bones and veins to fend for themselves and no one else knows how to run the joint so they didnt fend very well and youre breathing but you cant move and so suddenly you wonder if you can even breathe and then youre not is there a word for that i feel like the germans probably have a word for that they have words for everything
[ things he is actually doing: checking to be sure john egbert is in fact alive.
Hello, John. I hope it isn't strange for me to send a message to you without notice.
Mr. Lupin mentioned that Vriska had turned into a statue. I was also one (at least, I believe so) until today. I was hoping I might be able to ask you a few things, since I would like to see what I can figure out about this strange phenomenon.
oh hey! somehow that does not surprise me. lupin is very helpful when it comes to sharing things. i did not realize other people were turning into statues too but that somehow makes this place even weirder. i can try to answer anything you want though.
1) hypothetically speaking how opposed are you to two dozen geese as pets 2) i have something for you but you have to promise not to swoon 3) 1 wasnt hypothetical i have 24 geese in my fucking sylladex and i need to empty it out theyre eating up all my card space and i feel like im thirteen again juggling like ten cards maximum and having to creatively rename everything "creatively" in this scenario meaning "god what caveman speak are you gonna fucking accept"
um. are they firebreathing geese? because some of the geese out there already tried to light me on fire and i am not looking forward to that possibility again. if the "something" is geese you do not have to worry about swooning, duh. or swooning of any kind for anything. why do you have 24, i thought the quest said only 12???
[ dave has never slept well or often, but he doesn't sleep much at all beyond one or two catnaps for three days because it's almost impossible to sleep when you're half sick with worry about everyone who simply isn't there. the entire point of living with john had been - well, for john to keep tabs on dave, maybe, but dave used it as a way to keep tabs on john. not what john did with his days or what all he got up to that john didn't want to or didn't think to tell him, but that john reliably was there at the end of the day, in one piece and mostly unharmed.
and then he woke up one day and that wasn't the case, and it drove him more than a little over some sort of edge. he wasted a day looking everywhere for the people who disappeared before admitting it wasn't going to happen and then he dedicated himself to beating the stupid goddamned fucking challenge and he wrote shitposts in red ink and hung them up around at random because he didn't even have the laptop working to draw on. he spun his wheels working in the garden and sketching out comics with his quill pen and playing haphazard tunes on the piano that went nowhere. he had like twelve heart to hearts with nauti buoy and tried to corral geese alone. he...
okay honestly he skipped like most meals save whatever he had in dirk's company but whatever, who fucking cares.
and more and more people disappeared. guren right in front of his eyes, grabbing those drugs, and it'd be so fucking easy to reach out and take something and see if that ended it all and they were all together again, but what if the only way to ensure that was to succeed? so deprived of even the ability to send john 10,000 text messages he won't read dave writes stupid letters around the edges of his comics and just.
it sucks. it's the worst three days and he hates it and it's stupid and he spends too much time alone on the roof sometimes not sleeping.
it's where he is when he feels midnight happen, and it's a little after that he notices the light on his laptop is on. dave doesn't even fucking bother to open it, doesn't bother to scour the names to see if everyone is still there. he simply jumps to his feet and checks the house as quickly as he can, top to bottom.
whether or not john is there doesn't actually matter. dave's obviously not going to sleep, and if john's in their house he'll find him and if he's at his old place in bluo he'll find him and he'll look until he finds his best friend because that's sort of important. he has to find everyone else, too, but he's looking for john first, at a stupid hour because sleep doesn't matter and sorry if john's asleep because dave isn't as nice as he was when he came home to find john curled up on his couch. awake or asleep, sitting or standing or laying down or whatever, dave's reaction is the same: he just hurls himself at john and hugs him and idiot idiot idiot. ]
Egbert. [ good, thank fuck, a relief. he doesn't know if he somehow lost or if the test is just over, or if john lost or won.
[This whole thing was a tragedy, really, in only because the temptation was daunting and even beyond that when the town appeared to be split up it became even worse. It was easier and better when people were around to distract him and he could help other people ignore their own temptations.
But then he woke up and everyone disappeared. He quietly freaked out and reacted in the same way he always had when left to his own devices. Stress-cleaning. The house and the town faced his wrath as he cleaned everything repeatedly and eventually it moved onto stress-cooking without thinking of it.
It's why the absent-minded taste-testing happened and suddenly he finds himself back in the town proper, alone and confused and he runs through the town checking for his friends and people he cares about.
It's a long day alone, but he's on his laptop and cleaning and waiting.
As such, on the 1st at midnight he suddenly finds himself awake when he hears even the slightest movement. He doesn't usually sleep so lightly but after the last few days he's trained himself to. It's why he hears the movement and before he can find Dave Dave finds him. He's out of his room and into the hall and suddenly there's an armful of Strider.
There's zero hesitation as he returns the hug, too tight and too secure and he sighs just a bit.]
What the fuck was that all about? [It's mumbled, but also:] You're back. You're really back, aren't you?
hey drop whatever youre doing we have something important to discuss so no windy shenanigans or quests or wtfever you do these days when youre not surgically attached to my hip this shit is top tier priority and we have to get it done now before any more bullshit occurs
whats your fursona gonna be bro i expect you to come up with something killer because lets be honest jade is totally squandering her potential in this regard she didnt even change her name and i am going to have to talk to her about that later like come on harley you had how many dreams about this shit when we were thirteen and then it happens and nope still jade harley not even a weak barkley change whats even up with that so disappointed in her tbh but we have to prep you for the furpocalypse before i give her my best disappointed look this is pretty much guaranteed to become relevant really quick so hit me with your best shot egbert make it happen
uh. you cannot put me on the spot like this! these things take TIME, dave. also yeah did i tell you about her ghostbuster she made? the most uncreative fursona ever but also it was just the right amount of hideous.
egbert when the hell did you become more of a morning person than me i mean aside from the part where you are definitely more cheerful in the mornings and like all the time unless youre in a mood but i thought i was the king of waking up early like when was the last time you actually beat me never never is when i had that crown i was the gold medal finalist and now suddenly youre deciding to compete??? bitch you cant just do that all of a sudden like a last minute olympic entry finland is gonna mark you down for RUDE because idk finland is my bro in this scenario not like my bro bro but like my friend bro you know what i meant anyway finland is gonna give you a 6.5 germany is holding up a 10 fuck you too germany and we go all the way down the line and suddenly youve racked up half a point more than me because like germany gave me a 2 for mocking them earlier despite me clearly deserving the 10 and then you like punch me and steal my metaphorical paper crown probably in the arm way too hard but in that friendly kinda way where you completely misjudge your own hammerarms and you just laugh
ok i forgot where i was going with this i think my main point was that youre not here so guess what fucker im skipping breakfast
ok no im not i grabbed an apple dont make the disappointed dad face at me it makes me feel like im five and also like i need to eat twice as much to make it disappear but anyway ill see you at lunch or dinner whichever happens first i mean lunch happens first chronologically but idk where the fuck you wandered off to maybe youre doing a day trip with jake to ok all thats coming to mind is wrestling or like larping movies are you on a secret movie larping date i cant believe you didnt take me with john you know i get bored and lonely if you abandon me to my own devices im a finicky little houseplant you have to water me daily or i wilt im wilting john my petals are all shriveled up because you arent here to entertain me go to your room and think about what youve done young man
yeah anyway ill see you later i have to hit up the garden though all this rain is probably gonna be good for it ill probably see you before you read all this nonsense anyway and by "read" i probably mean "skim and say dave what the fuck were you sending me all these messages for i left the house for like two hours you loser" but details
dirk skipped lunch and by dirk skipped lunch i mean i cannot fucking find dirk so thats a thing and you know theres like another thing that is slightly concerning here eggs egbert eggsalad egg roll hardboiled eggs easter eggs weird eggy thing jade really wanted
yeah im like in your actual room staring at your laptop typing this so this is real fucking pointless but bottom line people are missing and guess who the fuck isnt here right you but your username isnt crossed out and the locket seems the same as it was yesterday so you havent met mortal harm or anything i think
goddamnit john why the fuck do you always take every opportunity to vanish into thin air im getting you a kiddy leash and you are not going to complain about it dirk may get off with a warning idk he hasnt disappeared on me before if this is that dumbass youre in one town and im in another thing again i am going to scream and also glue myself to your hip who the fuck keeps splitting us up its like we keep having to change our seats or something dont teachers do that like change up the seating chart its always so dramatic on tv but anyway im the overdramatic kid whos like FUCK no dont move me away from john how will i pass notes in class to him if im across the room which like of course is why im being moved and youre probably a little relieved because maybe you can listen in class idk youre kind of nerdy you probably always take the notes but maybe want me to chill out on them a little dave dont you know we have a quiz today and youre like dave its fine ill talk to you after class but no it is not fine patterns state this will be over in a few days and you will be back where i can see you but like
ffs im worried about you this is not fine im skipping dinner its dumb without you here
ok no im not youd probably be annoyed so ill find something to eat later first im going into the woods which im telling you about now so im not breaking the promise about not doing dangerous shit without telling you except like we both know im loopholing because you cant fucking read this right now but its ok guren is organizing it were going to look for all of you so ill see you soon hopefully and i will read you the riot act about disappearing into the woods and i will ground you until college and also after college you will be so grounded john i will nail your dumbass little hood to the ground and you will at most be a very sulky kite so help me god
anyway stay safe ill be there soon hopefully i think im coming down with a cold i think i told you id tell you next time i got sick so this counts as me telling you congrats youre missing out on this momentous occasion i cant believe youre skipping our memories you owe me a kodak picture moment to make up for it
[What if he doesn't answer and instead just shoves his laptop in his sylladex and heads to the roof? That's what he's doing, flying up there a little more slowly than usual to give Dave time to prepare. Apparently this is a no questions asked kind of thing.]
[Perhaps predictably he's in the kitchen when Dave actually enters the house, but he stops whatever he's doing and heads for the living room. He knows Dave went off with Okuyasu and John figured that was fine, whatever, but the sight before him is maybe a little less fine.
He wanders over to the couch, raising an eyebrow and staring down at Dave.]
[ which i'm just dropping here so i don't forget, which can be ignored until after the other stuff. but anyway. it's been a While and dave hasn't followed through on that whole date thing so far, but there is a knock at the front door?
hi john hope you're home. if you are, dave will nervously shove some flowers at you. ones with color! this means peonies, lilies, roses, irises, tulips, lavender - whatever he could find of those with stuff to them.
he's also dressed in a suit jacket and nicer shirt, layered over his black skinny jeans just...because.
apparently the time for the date is right the fuck now!
[John's home. John's home and he's not sure who's knocking so he goes to answer the front door. He's immediately bombarded with flowers and a muffled "What?" is heard among the irises.
He's very much not dressed up because nobody told him, but he's also...definitely wearing Dave's record tee? So there's that. At least they can go on a date where he's not wearing his godtier shit.
He brings the flowers down to look at them, examining the colors and trying to identify the types but he's not that great with botany like Jade is. They're nice though, and he looks up at Dave and seems to register that this is a date.
Except nobody told him??? SO.]
...it's kind of cute that you knocked on the door to your own house. [Hi Dave.] These are pretty.
[ the mornings are getting colder. so are the nights. it's like 32 degrees outside and that is like 40 degrees below acceptable? so dave's dragged every blanket they own into the room - or that's what he did before bed last night, rather, - and he's now fully dedicated to burrowing into john as much as possible and basically just using his bff as a convenient heater. there's nothing even slightly romantic about this, he's just REALLY FUCKING COLD.
but anyway, he wakes up because of course he does (does he have to, really,) and: ]
So I have an idea.
[ it's a maybe terrible idea, even if so far it won't got terribly badly for him. ]
[Meanwhile, John's probably really overheated and putting up with it. He loves Dave, he really does, but did it have to be every blanket? There's a face in his ribs and he makes a face as he shifts to accommodate, wrapping an arm around Dave to warm him up and also giving him a half-lidded look. It's too early, probably.]
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
3/19 text user #e00707
sounds like your speed
you know i just found the rough draft i had night one to send to this account
when i assumed it was your account but didnt know for sure
i forget why i didnt send it i guess i found my sense of shame that has only worked intermittently for like sixteen years
its since broken again but whatever you know
anyway im told there will be food and obviously a huge ass fire
which is
i suppose every component of a bonfire?
ive never actually been to a bonfire
i suppose it appeals to the inner pyromaniac in us all
which must be a human nature thing
and troll nature thing
ive never actually tried burning shit either
except for food on accident
which i guess doesnt count as trying
thats more just fate
anyway
ill talk to you later dude
this has been a psa re bonfires
remember
only you can prevent forest fires
do you remember those commercials
i miss fucking stupid commercials
weirdest thing to miss about earth but i do
later
no subject
who else is going?
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
#A5211F ; 3/23
On top of that, I've got you with Joshua as your second teacher. #000033. He's a lot more calm and collected than Ochako, and I've got the feeling he'll go at it from a different angle, too. He's got knives, but that doesn't mean he can't teach you and your hammer a thing or two.
Oh, and you’re sparring Shouto, a classmate of hers. Username #57A7C5. He’s got a quirk too, and he’s pretty strong, so don’t take him for granted or hold back.
There are no changes. If you back out of this, you’re letting everyone down, so go tell them yourself and don’t waste my time again. I’m not holding your hand through all of this, but you can let me know if you have questions. That’s all.
no subject
haven't met joshua though so i will figure that out. knives are fine. and i'll just have to ask shouto what his quirk is (unless you know. do you know??)
but cool. glad to know there's no pressure here or anything. thanks a lot.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
#E07CA0; 4/1
you're my teacher AND my student! yay!
we're going to have a ton of fun! :)
no subject
when do you want to start?
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
action!; backdated to 4/3
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
4/1 text user #e00707
whats it called when theres a ghost sitting on your chest when you wake up and you cant move
thats what they say it is right
when theres all the pins and needles and you think about moving and you can even picture your hand reaching out
but your fingers dont so much as twitch
and youre screaming at them to but the synapses just dont fire
or they do but they cant connect with your nerves
like your nerves all went out to lunch
didnt even bother to leave a sign on the door
left your tendons and bones and veins to fend for themselves
and no one else knows how to run the joint so they didnt fend very well
and youre breathing but you cant move and so suddenly you wonder if you can even breathe and then youre not
is there a word for that
i feel like the germans probably have a word for that
they have words for everything
[ things he is actually doing: checking to be sure john egbert is in fact alive.
...via whatever this is. ]
no subject
i think maybe that is a panic attack.
or a night terror?
something like that.
still breathing?
[He's not qualified for this but he can try.]
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
#FFDF00; 4/6 post forest
no subject
how are things on your end?
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
#3630FF
no subject
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
5/2 evening text user #e00707
probably
[ amazing, a notification from a cat.
...of course, dave pretty much immediately goes out so john will have to wait to find out why or do research on the network. ]
no subject
thanks.
[He'll. Ask about things later, maybe. It's Dave's business so as long as Dave comes back eventually he's satisfied.]
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
#49809C
Hello, John. I hope it isn't strange for me to send a message to you without notice.
Mr. Lupin mentioned that Vriska had turned into a statue. I was also one (at least, I believe so) until today. I was hoping I might be able to ask you a few things, since I would like to see what I can figure out about this strange phenomenon.
Sincerely,
Elizabeth
no subject
somehow that does not surprise me. lupin is very helpful when it comes to sharing things. i did not realize other people were turning into statues too but that somehow makes this place even weirder.
i can try to answer anything you want though.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
#e00707
2) i have something for you but you have to promise not to swoon
3) 1 wasnt hypothetical i have 24 geese in my fucking sylladex and i need to empty it out
theyre eating up all my card space and i feel like im thirteen again
juggling like ten cards maximum and having to creatively rename everything
"creatively" in this scenario meaning "god what caveman speak are you gonna fucking accept"
no subject
are they firebreathing geese? because some of the geese out there already tried to light me on fire and i am not looking forward to that possibility again.
if the "something" is geese you do not have to worry about swooning, duh.
or swooning of any kind for anything.
why do you have 24, i thought the quest said only 12???
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
06/01
and then he woke up one day and that wasn't the case, and it drove him more than a little over some sort of edge. he wasted a day looking everywhere for the people who disappeared before admitting it wasn't going to happen and then he dedicated himself to beating the stupid goddamned fucking challenge and he wrote shitposts in red ink and hung them up around at random because he didn't even have the laptop working to draw on. he spun his wheels working in the garden and sketching out comics with his quill pen and playing haphazard tunes on the piano that went nowhere. he had like twelve heart to hearts with nauti buoy and tried to corral geese alone. he...
okay honestly he skipped like most meals save whatever he had in dirk's company but whatever, who fucking cares.
and more and more people disappeared. guren right in front of his eyes, grabbing those drugs, and it'd be so fucking easy to reach out and take something and see if that ended it all and they were all together again, but what if the only way to ensure that was to succeed? so deprived of even the ability to send john 10,000 text messages he won't read dave writes stupid letters around the edges of his comics and just.
it sucks. it's the worst three days and he hates it and it's stupid and he spends too much time alone on the roof sometimes not sleeping.
it's where he is when he feels midnight happen, and it's a little after that he notices the light on his laptop is on. dave doesn't even fucking bother to open it, doesn't bother to scour the names to see if everyone is still there. he simply jumps to his feet and checks the house as quickly as he can, top to bottom.
whether or not john is there doesn't actually matter. dave's obviously not going to sleep, and if john's in their house he'll find him and if he's at his old place in bluo he'll find him and he'll look until he finds his best friend because that's sort of important. he has to find everyone else, too, but he's looking for john first, at a stupid hour because sleep doesn't matter and sorry if john's asleep because dave isn't as nice as he was when he came home to find john curled up on his couch. awake or asleep, sitting or standing or laying down or whatever, dave's reaction is the same: he just hurls himself at john and hugs him and idiot idiot idiot. ]
Egbert. [ good, thank fuck, a relief. he doesn't know if he somehow lost or if the test is just over, or if john lost or won.
it doesn't really matter at all. ]
no subject
But then he woke up and everyone disappeared. He quietly freaked out and reacted in the same way he always had when left to his own devices. Stress-cleaning. The house and the town faced his wrath as he cleaned everything repeatedly and eventually it moved onto stress-cooking without thinking of it.
It's why the absent-minded taste-testing happened and suddenly he finds himself back in the town proper, alone and confused and he runs through the town checking for his friends and people he cares about.
It's a long day alone, but he's on his laptop and cleaning and waiting.
As such, on the 1st at midnight he suddenly finds himself awake when he hears even the slightest movement. He doesn't usually sleep so lightly but after the last few days he's trained himself to. It's why he hears the movement and before he can find Dave Dave finds him. He's out of his room and into the hall and suddenly there's an armful of Strider.
There's zero hesitation as he returns the hug, too tight and too secure and he sighs just a bit.]
What the fuck was that all about? [It's mumbled, but also:] You're back. You're really back, aren't you?
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
#E00707 set nebulously whenever tf vriska does the dice thing
are you chill with being left nauti buoy in my will
and like
my collection of bones
no subject
why?
i mean yes i will take care of your lobster, whatever, but why are you dying and leaving me bones and shellfish?
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
during werewolves, not priority
so no windy shenanigans or quests or wtfever you do these days when youre not surgically attached to my hip
this shit is top tier priority and we have to get it done now before any more bullshit occurs
whats your fursona gonna be bro
i expect you to come up with something killer because lets be honest jade is totally squandering her potential in this regard
she didnt even change her name and i am going to have to talk to her about that later
like come on harley you had how many dreams about this shit when we were thirteen and then it happens and nope
still jade harley
not even a weak barkley change whats even up with that
so disappointed in her tbh
but we have to prep you for the furpocalypse before i give her my best disappointed look
this is pretty much guaranteed to become relevant really quick
so hit me with your best shot egbert
make it happen
no subject
you cannot put me on the spot like this! these things take TIME, dave.
also yeah did i tell you about her ghostbuster she made? the most uncreative fursona ever but also it was just the right amount of hideous.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
#0000E6, i'm so sorry
u have been CHOSEN by.........the $ MONEY GOO$E $
send the $ MONEY GOO$E $ CURSE to 300 people or you'll succumb to the ever-burning FIRES OF HELL
im screaming wtf
i don't want to be cursed!!
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
after the text thread on the 3rd
Okay, so explain.
no subject
It's easy. I want you to tell me everything, we already went over that. The honesty thing.
[Okay, and...?]
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
8/12 onwards, 1/probably a few i'll let you know whenever they end
i mean aside from the part where you are definitely more cheerful in the mornings
and like
all the time unless youre in a mood
but i thought i was the king of waking up early
like
when was the last time you actually beat me
never
never is when
i had that crown
i was the gold medal finalist
and now suddenly youre deciding to compete???
bitch you cant just do that all of a sudden
like a last minute olympic entry
finland is gonna mark you down for RUDE
because idk finland is my bro in this scenario
not like my bro bro
but like my friend bro
you know what i meant
anyway finland is gonna give you a 6.5
germany is holding up a 10
fuck you too germany
and we go all the way down the line and suddenly youve racked up half a point more than me
because like germany gave me a 2 for mocking them earlier
despite me clearly deserving the 10
and then you like punch me and steal my metaphorical paper crown
probably in the arm
way too hard but in that friendly kinda way
where you completely misjudge your own hammerarms
and you just laugh
ok i forgot where i was going with this
i think my main point was that youre not here so guess what fucker im skipping breakfast
ok no im not i grabbed an apple dont make the disappointed dad face at me
it makes me feel like im five and also like i need to eat twice as much to make it disappear
but anyway ill see you at lunch or dinner whichever happens first
i mean lunch happens first chronologically but idk where the fuck you wandered off to
maybe youre doing a day trip with jake to
ok all thats coming to mind is wrestling
or like larping movies
are you on a secret movie larping date
i cant believe you didnt take me with
john you know i get bored and lonely if you abandon me to my own devices
im a finicky little houseplant
you have to water me daily or i wilt
im wilting john
my petals are all shriveled up because you arent here to entertain me
go to your room and think about what youve done young man
yeah anyway ill see you later i have to hit up the garden though all this rain is probably gonna be good for it
ill probably see you before you read all this nonsense anyway
and by "read" i probably mean "skim and say dave what the fuck were you sending me all these messages for i left the house for like two hours you loser"
but details
no subject
and by dirk skipped lunch i mean
i cannot fucking find dirk
so thats a thing
and you know theres like another thing
that is slightly concerning here
eggs
egbert
eggsalad
egg roll
hardboiled eggs
easter eggs
weird eggy thing jade really wanted
yeah im like in your actual room staring at your laptop typing this so this is real fucking pointless
but bottom line people are missing and guess who the fuck isnt here
right
you
but your username isnt crossed out
and the locket seems the same as it was yesterday so you havent met mortal harm or anything
i think
goddamnit john why the fuck do you always take every opportunity to vanish into thin air
im getting you a kiddy leash
and you are not going to complain about it
dirk may get off with a warning idk he hasnt disappeared on me before
if this is that dumbass youre in one town and im in another thing again
i am going to scream
and also glue myself to your hip
who the fuck keeps splitting us up
its like we keep having to change our seats or something
dont teachers do that
like change up the seating chart
its always so dramatic on tv
but anyway im the overdramatic kid whos like FUCK no dont move me away from john
how will i pass notes in class to him if im across the room
which like of course is why im being moved
and youre probably a little relieved because maybe you can listen in class
idk youre kind of nerdy you probably always take the notes but maybe want me to chill out on them a little
dave dont you know we have a quiz today
and youre like dave its fine ill talk to you after class
but no it is not fine
patterns state this will be over in a few days and you will be back where i can see you
but like
ffs im worried about you
this is not fine
im skipping dinner its dumb without you here
ok no im not youd probably be annoyed so ill find something to eat later
first im going into the woods
which im telling you about now so im not breaking the promise about not doing dangerous shit without telling you
except like
we both know im loopholing
because you cant fucking read this right now
but its ok
guren is organizing it
were going to look for all of you
so
ill see you soon hopefully
and i will read you the riot act about disappearing into the woods
and i will ground you until college
and also
after college
you will be so grounded john i will nail your dumbass little hood to the ground and you will at most be a very sulky kite so help me god
anyway
stay safe ill be there soon hopefully
i think im coming down with a cold
i think i told you id tell you next time i got sick so this counts as me telling you
congrats
youre missing out on this momentous occasion
i cant believe youre skipping our memories
you owe me a kodak picture moment to make up for it
later
(no subject)
(no subject)
he's done, enjoy this whenever john gets back to his laptop. tho he likely sent more than this
9/8 text user #e00707
no subject
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
text before i forget, pre-event post dirk leaving
no subject
oh wait.
shit, really?
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
10 something ???
comes home drained as fuck and immediately flops onto the couch.
sounds are made into the cushion that are maybe words. he cannot be fucked to go find john, hi john how are you. ]
no subject
He wanders over to the couch, raising an eyebrow and staring down at Dave.]
Uh. Welcome home...?
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
after the last thing
hi john hope you're home. if you are, dave will nervously shove some flowers at you. ones with color! this means peonies, lilies, roses, irises, tulips, lavender - whatever he could find of those with stuff to them.
he's also dressed in a suit jacket and nicer shirt, layered over his black skinny jeans just...because.
apparently the time for the date is right the fuck now!
what do you do? ]
no subject
He's very much not dressed up because nobody told him, but he's also...definitely wearing Dave's record tee? So there's that. At least they can go on a date where he's not wearing his godtier shit.
He brings the flowers down to look at them, examining the colors and trying to identify the types but he's not that great with botany like Jade is. They're nice though, and he looks up at Dave and seems to register that this is a date.
Except nobody told him??? SO.]
...it's kind of cute that you knocked on the door to your own house. [Hi Dave.] These are pretty.
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
11/1
but anyway, he wakes up because of course he does (does he have to, really,) and: ]
So I have an idea.
[ it's a maybe terrible idea, even if so far it won't got terribly badly for him. ]
no subject
What kind of idea?
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
post intro
no subject
[They're probably talking about two separate things here.]
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
#005682, towards the end of the month
You 8usy?
no subject
why? what's up?
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
(no subject)
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...
...